Interpersonal Trauma: What the Body Remembers

Interpersonal trauma doesn’t always begin with a major event. Sometimes, it’s woven into the small moments where we felt excluded, humiliated, unsafe, or unseen — or where we were mocked in front of others, put on the spot, and made to feel small under the gaze of a group.

Such experiences can leave us feeling ashamed, inferior, or as though something is wrong with us. Over time, they quietly shape how we relate to ourselves and to others. This kind of trauma often leaves traces not just in our memories, but in our bodies and relationships. It can show up as chronic tension, a fear of being judged, difficulty trusting, or the instinct to withdraw when we feel exposed. These reactions may have once been necessary for survival — and yet, they can linger long after the threat is gone.

Healing doesn’t mean “getting over it,” but rather, gently turning toward our experience with curiosity and compassion. As therapists and as individuals, we can ask reflective questions like “What did I learn to hide in order to feel safe?” to open space for understanding. The path toward healing begins when we give ourselves permission to feel, name, and make meaning of what happened, at our own pace, and in our own way.